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karoliina


Member

Posted Tue May 8th, 2007 2:25pm Post subject: a small word
sorry to trouble everyone, but I think I could use some comments: I have not been diagnosed with anything, but there is something wrong (surfing the net checking out symptoms doesn't do any good!). I have very stressful time in my life at the mo, and I can tell when things are getting out of hand because I work like mad and get tons of results, but get no joy out of them. Then things brighten up, I feel really good about everything, but stop getting ahead with my work, my ideas just drain and of course that brings me down again. These things have just been going on so quickly lately, every couple of days and I am a different person. It has started to scare me because I feel like I don't have control over myself anymore, and I just get more and more isolated. SO, the thing is, is anyone maybe having similar feelings, and if they do, maybe drop me a line and tell me how you deal with things. I know talking is good but I think everyone around me is sick and tired to hear about me me me me me me.
Hoping this made sense, and hopefully I am not moaning too much!

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Fourth Feline


Member

Posted Tue May 8th, 2007 4:58pm Post subject: a small word
Hi Karolina,

Hello and welcome,

The things you are experiencing are tantalizingly ambiguous, but do sound familiar to my experiences when I was working a few years ago.

On the one hand, your experiences, do sound like the rather insiduous effects of 'ordinary' workplace/lifestyle stress. Don't get me wrong Karolina, that alone can be quite debilitating - and still worthy of swift attention to try and make this a passing phase in an otherwise successful career.

However.

Your specific description of:

"I can tell when things are getting out of hand because I work like mad and get tons of results, but get no joy out of them. Then things brighten up again I feel really good about everything, but stop getting ahead with my work, my ideas just drain and of course that brings me down again"

- sound rather like my own early experiences of Bi-Polar type II.

I will explain where and why:

"I work like mad and get tons of results, but get no joy out of them" .


- This sounds like when I got hypo-manic ( sometimes very subtly ).
Mania or it's little brother hypo-mania can come with euphoria where one is ecstatic with the outcome, or dysphoria where one feels energised yet hollow and unfulfilled with the outcome. They are however, both types of the same 'high'.

"Then things brighten up again I feel really good about everything, but stop getting ahead with my work, "


- The above sounds like my transition back onto but then through the centre line of the mood swing.

" my ideas just drain and of course that brings me down again"

- which sounds like the the depressive part of the cycle.

You could have 'Cyclothymia' - a milder condition, which exists between what Psychiatrists would call 'ordinary' mood swings and Bi-Polar II.

It also could be that you are going through/working with an unrealistic set of expectations/inner thoughts or dialogue. What Cognitive Behavioural Therapists would refer to as "Cognitive Distortions".

There exists ( for unlearning these 'self defeating habits' ) courses of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - or C.B.T. for short.

Even if one has Bi-Polar illness at a deeper biological level, C.B.T skills are still useful in empowering the individual to be as effective as possible within any given situation.

As I am diagnosed as being Bi-Polar II, and it has become severe and 'tidal' in in nature, I need life long medication to stay reasonably safe and/or reasonably comfortable. ( Watch this space ).

Considering the above speculations, as to how that may fit your situation, a visit to your G.P. sounds like a good idea and perhaps ( if you both agree ) a referral to the Consultant psychiatrist allocated to your postcode area e.t.c.

I could be reading too much into your situation Karolina, but hope my musings may have given you food for thought or something to compare to.

Regards,

F.F.

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karoliina


Member

Posted Tue May 8th, 2007 9:49pm Post subject: a small word
Thank you, you write really well - and what you say makes a lot of sense!

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Fourth Feline


Member

Posted Tue May 8th, 2007 9:55pm Post subject: a small word
- Thank you for the kind words Karolina, just glad there was something in there that resonated. I am not clinically 'qualified' to give an opinion, just one of the tainted.

I shall allow myself a cup of tea and a nice warm feeling inside.

Take care and ( if you feel like it ) let me/us know how your situation works out.

Best wishes,

F.F.

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