STEPHEN FRY

Sorry to hear that Marz - keep ur chin up.

Been off again - had a down week, too many pressures, money, business life in general.

Looks like I am on the way up again but not sleeping again. Seems like we can never have it all.

The business is getting there but it takes so long to get set up and I need to earn money. Hopefully getting a grant to help, does not help that my benefits have not been sorted yet they owe me money from 15th May.

Take care all,
Amanada Groves

Still a bit quiet where is everybody

Hope you are all doing OK

Vx

I'm loitering too. Been utterly mental at work and I'm doing ridiculously long days then being on call all night. It helps my serenity no end. So I haven't been up for much chatting. Also my number was given to somebody without my consent, someone who needs help but not anything I am able to give. It's tragic, but there's nothing I can do. This has not deterred them from phoning me at sociable hours like 6am, not fantastic on a work day when I'm already shattered.

Here's a wee question for you - do you ever get hooked on a particular artist of whatever type and compulsively track down all their work and probably a biography too, and then find that they are very similar to you? I have a repeated pattern of hearing/seeing/reading something, getting obsessed and gathering all the info I can find, and then discover that they are alcoholic/addict and probably manic depressive too. Makes me laugh every time in a wry way (once I'm done crying at the nature of their tragic death)

Had a real down day, so much to do and just frozen, couldn't do any of it. So to cheer myself up I watched a film. Unfortunately I chose La Vie en Rose. By the time I'd watched it I had to go out just in case I accidentely killed myself with a pair of slippers. And to add to the experience, I decided to have a fish supper for tea and the chip shop was shut. England is shit, the 24hr supermarkets shut at 4pm, the chip shops are shut on Sun, you can't eat anywhere on a Sun or Mon night, it's just all round pants.

Good to hear from you guys.

My business officially started 6th September 2010

Got my first contract today, just a 1 day job but it's a start. I have joined PeoplePerHour.com and currently bidding for 13 jobs/projects all remote I.e. Home based. So I can work and have time to get to appointments and stay well.

Great site anyone else wanting self-employment should check it out.

My business is on Twitter and facebook just search for Techkit.
Vx

That's weird..... the book is good - though there is a slightly gross bit in the middle-ish area, from what I remember. Wonder why she was going on about that book in particular?

Had a shit day with son yesterday. The day before we had a meeting to discuss his Individualized Education Plan. The genius psychologist thought my son should be in on the meeting. She kept referring to herself as PhD or doctor. I got aggitated and told his teacher after, that this woman's PhD means no more than my AsS if she does not know my kid!! The PhD suggested possible half day for my son, which of course he is all for. When yesterday ended up not being half day he started self harming.

My son was wearing a dog tag type chain and was trying to choke himself and cut himself with the metal end of a pencil. School police came and followed me to the ER. Of course he was not admitted. The doc said he was not going to admit him for bad behavior. Next time I am going to take him to another hospital.

My dad's wife is a social worker and in the process of becoming a certified behavior analyst. I emailed her the drafts of all the paperwork to get her take on things.

Today has been ok. Felt somber though due to 9/11 anniversary. One of those days I will always remember what I was doing, where I was...
My son actually worked on a report due next week. No argueing or anything.

Will keep on keeping on I suppose.

DRL, I think we can both be helped and learn from each others posts. I get to hear things from a younger persons perspective and you can hear things from a parents perspective. If any of the things I describe make sense to you I would certainly love to hear your thoughts.

Hope everyone is doing well!!!
XXXXXXX

I've been mulling it over Marz, and I think some of your problems are similar to the ones my parents have and others are not. The nature of my mental illness (that's the first time I've called it that... makes me cringe somehow, is that wrong?) is different from your son's.

I'm not much like your son, really. Life was a cakewalk until I had to go to high school at the age of 13 and I got into trouble because I hadn't been prepared to be different from everyone else, in a bad sense. I've never gotten into much trouble at school (well, not the kind that angers people, if that even makes sense) besides one single case of undeserved detention which I was later exhumed of... I'd been forced to sit with the noisy people who did as they did and drove the teacher mad enough to give everyone in their group of tables detention. I'd said two words in total. My parents have never had to abort their days to come fetch me or face any of the things you have to.

My brother has caused them more of that kind of trouble... he'd gotten involved in a burglary for which he was lifted from his bed at 6 AM and taken to the police station, which sort of traumatized my mother. She'd gotten up to pee and a great beam of light shone into her face, which turned out to be a searchlight used by the cops. She still checks for them whenever she gets up now. My brother got community service and learned nothing that I know of. I don't know much about him, really. I know he has a violent temper and almost anything sets him off, and that he secretly loves me and thinks that anyone who hurts me has no right to live... which I'm fine with. I know he's got a hole in his hand, because the day he gets his salary he gets a luxurious new coat and he's broke the next day and mooches off my parents for the rest of the month. They're afraid of his temper. It's scary. He's thrown things, smashed things, kicked a dent in my mothers car over not being allowed to borrow it, gone through a dozen phones because he keeps breaking them. (I did break one once.)
They've had problems with him since he was 6 years old. They think it's because my parents found out I was handicapped when I was two (and he was 4) and gave me a lot of attention, which is understandable because it changed life as they knew it. He got neglected a little in that period and never recovered. It isn't unheard of, siblings of sick children or otherwise attention-grabbing children that act out to get attention.

He's your treasure trove, Marz. He knows what you'd want to know. He thinks psychiatrists are laughable, however, and would kill me if he knew I'd told you about him. (I'm not even kidding)
I have no insight in his doing what he does whatsoever, but I'd be happy to share my own insights with you for as far as the rails converge.

By all of this I mean to say I'm not sure I'm the one who can help you, and the person who actually can, won't. Unless he has a lobotomy of some kind.