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elTweeno


Member

Posted Fri Sep 17th, 2010 6:37pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Wow, everyone's been so busy!

Glad things are, at least, steady marz; 'ok' is good, you've had a hard time so it's nice to hear 'ok' from you, at least!

Vampyros, well done on the business. And thanks for that link, very helpful when commissions aren't forthcoming!

DRL, I'm glad school went well for you. We've not properly, really, met on here, but you sound very intuitive. You'd probably sound even more intuitive if my concentration was good enough to read your posts properly!! Sorry

KS - hope things are ok. Or at least not declining. Keep safe.

I don't have an awful lot of time right now, but I just thought I'd drop by & make a little announcement that (I suppose) isn't that important to anyone but me, but is happy enough for me to want to share with people who might actually understand it's significance!

I've always been bad at relationships. I mean, downright awful. Nothing longer than 2 weeks. But for a whole 5 weeks I've been seeing someone, and that in itself is a rather proud thing for me (especially in a wildly mixed mood!). But the other night I went one better: I took the huge, brave step of...telling him about my Bipolar. I was genuinely terrified; I've had a few good reactions, but many bad ones, so I'm exceptionally wary of telling people now, and particularly those who mean so much to me. I'd spent hours figuring out how to tell him, whether I even should, and how far to go (I have an...interesting history...). But he didn't run away, or even react with surprise; he was amazing about it. I'm happier now than I've ever been, all because someone was understanding! I guess its the little things that count.

I think I've moved forward on that whole 'trust' thing. Which, to those of you with long memories around here, is probably quite a surprise!

So, yeah, thats my news. I've had an awful week at work, fallen out with my very best friend, and not slept in days - but I'm so happy. Just from that one little thing.

So....does this mean there's hope? For humankind & understanding, I mean?

eT

I'm also on Twitter: elTweeno (of course!)

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realitystops


Member

Posted Fri Sep 17th, 2010 7:54pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Time to say Hi! Been a long time. In the gutter of my mind not knowing why - as usual - My wife is brilliant and desperate to keep her happy. Difficult enough staying alive Trying to keep that going Hmmm.
Why do I know I am wanted, loved and even appreciated and in this hole - not - have any emotional response AT ALL?
The clouds are good here, they pass without making a difference. I hope to become one. One day.
Turning things off, one by one is my life now. Will my things to turn off outlast me?

Hi - is horrible - please ignore it and remember I may have turned hello off for a while. Thank You

Is you is
Or
Is you ain't

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realitystops


Member

Posted Mon Sep 20th, 2010 9:28pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Have I killed you all?

Is you is
Or
Is you ain't

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heatherthevet


Member

Posted Tue Sep 21st, 2010 1:57am Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Nah, you'll have to try harder than that if you want to bump us all off!
I've been either extremely busy doing far too much, or hiding in plain sight waiting to be rescued. Just the usual then!


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marzgirl


Member

Posted Sun Sep 26th, 2010 6:21am Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Had a fairly good week, just regular. Now all I want to do is crash. I hate days that I do not want to even get out of bed. Only my bladder and kids yelling at each other gets me out.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."
~Martin Luther King Jr.~

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Vampyros


Member

Posted Sun Sep 26th, 2010 2:13pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Sometimes I wish I had kids as an enforced reason to get up.

The wife feeds the pets when I am really down so I just lie there thinking what's the point.

Had a week like that last week but CPN sorted me out.

I know why it happened and will have a proper rnatwhen at the computer-easier to type.

Vx

I think my multiple personalities have multiple personalities - makes for quite a party.

"Books and friends should be few but good."

"It is better to be in chains with friends , than to be in a garden with strangers." -Persian Proverb
"Don't be dismayed at goodbyes. A farewell is before you can meet again. And meeting again after a moment or a lifetime is certain for those who are friends." - Richard Bach

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realitystops


Member

Posted Mon Sep 27th, 2010 9:26pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Crazy though it seems I have no idea why I write here - so little that is!

To create,is be my desire.

Create, make summink. Anifink.

Get up, out and do it. Please, please, please make somthing from what you have in you.

I think a pile of ashes placed precisely will be a fine show of creative drive but no talent.

Is you is
Or
Is you ain't

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marzgirl


Member

Posted Thu Sep 30th, 2010 7:38pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Son is in hospital. Has been in since Mon. afternoon. So badly want to get him sorted. Also worried about his biodad causing trouble. PISSS!!

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."
~Martin Luther King Jr.~

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marzgirl


Member

Posted Mon Oct 4th, 2010 8:26pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

My son had a MRI yesterday. Now a consult with pediatric neurologist has to be set up. Abnormal findings in the temporal lobe (bright spots) and brain volume is below average.
Don't know what all the f#c! this means so I hope the neurology appt can be set up soon.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."
~Martin Luther King Jr.~

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heatherthevet


Member

Posted Mon Oct 4th, 2010 11:24pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Waiting is hellish. Thinking about you, hope you get a clearer picture soon


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greentree


Member

Posted Tue Oct 5th, 2010 10:00pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Ditto marz. Try and look after yourself as well through all this - you'll be no good to anyone if you're exhausted! It's hard, i know.

No sig.

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realitystops


Member

Posted Wed Oct 6th, 2010 8:34pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Real problems loom large in these posts - my thoughts are with you.

My insides are empty and I give up.

No answers.

Switch off the asking circuits - NOW!

No conception of motivation - switch off too NOW!

Well maybe tomorrow it will be >ok

read in to see

Is you is
Or
Is you ain't

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marzgirl


Member

Posted Thu Oct 7th, 2010 8:13am Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

My gran died yesterday. 93 years old. She outlived her body at least 12 years ago. I did not think it would hurt so much, and I would miss her so much. You expect old people to die. She has not been doing well for the last six months. Cried my eyes out yesterday, then had to visit son in hospital still.
It all just bloody hurts!!!!

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."
~Martin Luther King Jr.~

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elTweeno


Member

Posted Fri Oct 8th, 2010 7:51pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Sorry to hear of your loss, Marz. I really hope things start getting better for you (and your son) soon - you deserve some good luck. My thoughts are with you - as is my inbox, if you ever need anything.

Hope everyone else is doing ok.

I'm in a really-tiny-writing mood (though I can't remember how to make the writing tiny here any more) so I'm going to be quiet for a bit - still reading along, just really not at my best.

eT

I'm also on Twitter: elTweeno (of course!)

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realitystops


Member

Posted Sun Oct 10th, 2010 8:30pm Post subject: IS IT CLEAR YET?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah?

What do I come here for?

Going now---

Is you is
Or
Is you ain't

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