so last night i saw a message from my mum up on one of these "friends" boards (like myspace but another one). under the details it said: Relationship: It's complicated. What does that mean??? As far as i know she is happily married to my dad (according to her). Not very nice for her to put something like this in a public forum? So now i don't know if i should ask her about it. Do i want to know? I sometimes feel confused about the boundaries of our mother/daughter relationship - such as she tells me more than i want to hear (eg. complaining about dad). What is normal? i know there is no such thing. but what is a semi-normal ideal you might go for?
anyway, sorry if this doesn't make much sense. when i went back to sleep i had a nightmare. about a friend of mine who i haven't seen for ages. do you know when you sometimes become conscious in your dream? then you can control what is happening. so i decided i would confront her about why she hadn't seen me for ages. she ran off, and then the dream took over again, another man joined her and she turned evil. it was really horrible!!! it made me think, when someone experiences psychosis, perhaps it is that dream part of your mind coming up into your conscious while you are awake.
anyway. feeling pretty frazzled today. hope i can just get through the day and have a good nights sleep. words of comfort, help, reassurance are appreciated as always...
p.s. it feels so surreal to read this back.