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Fourth Feline


Member

Posted Wed Apr 18th, 2007 12:54am Post subject: Obsessions
Hello and welcome Jamie

Whilst I have not experienced the exact sequence of events that you have, I feel there are enough similarities to re-assure you that you are not alone in these matters. Certainly, one of the first signs of me becoming depressed is obsessive and anxiety states.

I am Bi-Polar type II, and whilst I too had problems at school with anxiety, depressive and obsessive states - it took a further 32 years for the 'true' diagnosis to become evident.

The diagnosis over 3 decades went something like :

Anxiety states ( 1975)

Anxiety with depression and obsessive disorders ( 1983 )

Bi-polar II (2004 ).

Points of (hopeful ) re-assurances are:

* Neurologists tell us that the human brain is still 'developing' during and sometime after our teen years, therefore:

* our true and treatable illness often needs time to properly manifest.

* When the Psychiatrists are more certain, they can proceed with treatment.

* Rushing a diagnosis and therefore giving the wrong treatment can be very counter productive.

* Your obsessive behaviour with relation to other people is another symptom of the underlying illness, not an indicator that you are yourself 'strange'. .

* It will be easier for you to take more control over your life/problems/illness as you grow older.

* Better things are therefore ahead.

* You are certainly not alone in having these types of feelings and symptoms.

Keep looking forward whenever possible and let us know how you are getting along.

Warm regards,

Derek.

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Wed Apr 18th, 2007 12:54am Post subject: Obsessions
nothing to say sorry about, its interesting what you've shared. main thing is stay safe

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:19am Post subject: Obsessions
Thanks.

I think I'm going to think of this person I'm obsessed with as my firewall, so to speak. As at the moment I do believe in a god, but at the same time, I feel I'm being controlled by someone in a grand play of some sort. It feels like this person knows me and controls me somehow, such as, if I'm at a party and I want sex off some girl, the person I'm obsessed with stops me from doing that, telling me its wrong through my thoughts. If god is there, then he knows that what I think about is wrong, but he forgives me as I am actually a good person. Ha. Its hard to think when my mood won't stay in one place for no longer than 5 minutes.

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:36am Post subject: Obsessions
What are you doing at the moment. With friends?

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:39am Post subject: Obsessions
No, on my own. Which at the moment isn't so good, I think i'm starting to see things. Hopefully should pass soon

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:41am Post subject: Obsessions
which day do you see the CPN?

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:43am Post subject: Obsessions
Tomorrow morning. Do you know of any live chat rooms? As I need to type to someone

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:50am Post subject: Obsessions
dont know such a lot about chat rooms but may be someone else can answer that one??? i'm happy to read what you type here though.

what do you think of the guitarist Frank Zappa , just wondering , as you say you play guitar?

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 12:57am Post subject: Obsessions
Haha frank, quirky, inspired steve vai so much. You can really see frank in steves music, beautiful how someone can influence somebody like that.
I'm sorrry about this, I mean, I don't like to burdon peopel. And its hard to tell whats real. Somebody in the hospital told me that we were being judged, with this illness, if it even is an illness. If somebody knows why I'm in this stupid play, I'd like to be taken out of it. Don't worry, I promised I wouldn't try anything like that again. Its just when it feels like this, I don't know, I'm starting to twitch and...sorry.
I know this is gonna go hopefully tonight,

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 1:03am Post subject: Obsessions
well you know your stuff on guitarists, don't you. an agree.hes my fave guitarist


make a quick answer that tonight is okay, and i gues you sound a little at the edge. but you sound like you have insight into how you feel at the moment. would that be right?

also, like to know how people do that amazing stuff all on six strings on a piece of wood. my fingers don't work that fast!

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 1:18am Post subject: Obsessions
My nurse is called chris..My insight into my illness is horrible, I don't want it, its twice the thought running at the same time, its real, its not.

As for fingers
I guess when peopel are dedicated to music, they'll do anything to express themselves, steve vai practices 8hours a day (Maybe 10).

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 1:26am Post subject: Obsessions
I really meant that you seem to have a handle on what you feel at the moment, but i gues you find the bigger picture of how you feel difficult to contemplate, so we won't.

Have you got any ideas around what you'll be doing between now and the morning? Is that a Christopher or a Christine, the CPn?

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 1:30am Post subject: Obsessions
Christopher. As for now, my mood is still a bit sketchy..I'll probably read http://www.marxists.org/reference/subject/philosophy/works/at/freud.htm alittle bit more. Music. I'll go to sleep when it letss me

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 1:46am Post subject: Obsessions
Thanks for taking the time to reply. Sounds like a good plan. i looked at the link an its amazing, a real lecture by S. Freud. You have some really intweresting things going on in your life.

I sense that your mood has shifted a little, a bit less disassociated,. . would it be a good idea to talk to Christopher about how you have been getting to think about the person off the tv, so that he can keep up to date well with how things arre changing for you at the moment?

I get the impression that you have recently been discharged from hospital, and that the follow up is a bit poor. Maybe it would be a good time to ask the |CPN to ask for a review of your careplan and meds.

I'm glad you replied to my posts. Is there anything i could do to help the situation tonight?

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TheTruth


Member

Posted Thu Apr 19th, 2007 1:53am Post subject: Obsessions
Thankyou for listening, I don't like to bother my friends with these matters.
I'll talk to chris tomorrow about her.
Thankyou

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