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Beyond


Member

Posted Sun Oct 7th, 2007 10:01pm Post subject: Ohoj
Hi every one !
I just wanted to share a moment with you,
Im from sweden and im 29 years old

My girlfriend just told me she cant live like this any more, my illness is to had to cope with and i have a light bipolar.

But the question that rings inside my head is can i blame her for it in my worst moments i cant stand myself.

A life alone is better off for me i guess, then i never haft to say im sorry for just being me again

Henrik

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Leatrice


Member

Posted Sun Oct 7th, 2007 11:09pm Post subject: Ohoj
Hi Henrik

Welcome. I'm not sure what to say really. I have had a group of friends turn their backs on me recently because they don't seem to be able to cope with my moods.

In some ways, the same as you, I can't blame them. I can be difficult to be around and I know that, but then I have other friends who just bide their time and wait for me to come out the other side of a depression and then just take up where we left off.

I think we all have the need to be loved and all I can say is that I hope you meet someone who can love you for who you are.

Hope things work out.

L x

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Sun Oct 7th, 2007 11:15pm Post subject: Ohoj
Henrik,

I'm someone who's been on the other side in a relaitonship ie. the person who doesn't have problems/disorder. It's hard to cope, I know that. it's clearly hard for your girlfriend to cope. How long have yout two been together?

I would talk to her. Tell her that you don't want to break up and that you realise how hard it is to cope with your moods. Are you seeking any sort of therapy?

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 12:57am Post subject: Ohoj
Deleted by user

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Vespertine


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 3:09am Post subject: Ohoj
I have been through this plenty of times and each time hurts. It can be very upsetting for the other person too though and it's important to remember that if they're not happy, you need to let them go. You can't sacrafice theirs as well as yours.

And sometimes when you're ill, you need to battle things without a partner. Not alone, but without a partner because you don't have that extra stress to worry about.

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seasun545


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 8:51am Post subject: Ohoj
Hi Henrik,
First, welcome to the forum.
Can´t help with this, cause I understand so well that feeling of "I can´t even stand myself" that I decided long ago that being alone would be my personal contribution to human kind, like a personal ong, so would not drive anyone crazy or confused anymore. It´s all about self-pity and low low self-steem, I´m afraid...strong demons to fight against. But there´s wonderful people round here giving so good advices as you see...so hang on and try some of those.
Good luck, and be the strength with you!!!

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Beyond


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 10:00am Post subject: Ohoj
Thanks for all the great reasponses !

I know i was abit short in my storry but to be honest i was afraid to write here at first.

We have been living toghter for seven years and we have 5 year old daughter to.
And im pretty sure that its when we founded out that i was bipolar for two years ago the thing concerned her the most was that she dident know if she liked the part of me always having it, she really was hoping for a cure

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 10:09am Post subject: Ohoj
Don't be afraid to write here. There's many people who can empathise greatly with your situation and we're all non-judgemental.

I understand your girlfriend's thought, being worried that you'd always have it and there was no cure. Mental illness does come with a certain stigma still unfortunately. Maybe that's why I tell people I'm a benign lunatic...

So tell us abotu your feelings: how do you feel abotu being bipolar? If there was a cure, would you want it?

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Saturn


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 10:18am Post subject: Ohoj
Beyond, All I can think is that [unless you only suddenly started showing signs of the disorder two years ago] she fell in love with you for all your good parts and bad parts, she must have seen you at both ends of the spectrum, only now it has a name, whereas before you didn't know what was wrong, am I correct?

What has actually changed though? Nothing. If she still loves you and is willing to accept you as you are what's the problem?

You both need to look at finding more information about BP, and together working out a strategy to deal with it between you.

Also, as far as I know there is no cure, its find a coping procedure, or a regime of medication or therapies that will help you tot deal with it as much as possible and she should, if she loves you be willing to help and support you when you need it.

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Beyond


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 12:43pm Post subject: Ohoj
Well both always now i was struggling with something, i never knew if it was from childhood or the ways i lived my life.

No, shes sure that she dosent feel the same anymore and she says that its to hard, we even signed the papers today we both gone have shared reasponsbility over our daughter.

And how i feel about being bipolar ?
Well im pretty sure i never wanted to take that part away from me thou, i guess it is how i am and now when i know what it is i can learn to face it better.

But i am scared to to be alone again in this and her support during the years is wha got me in to the process of finding out what it was.

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Saturn


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 12:51pm Post subject: Ohoj
Well I'm sorry to hear that

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whattocallmyself


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 2:21pm Post subject: Ohoj
Beyond, its always tough with breakups. *hugs*
I cant give you any advice, since I am not in your position.
Hopefully everything will turn out fine for you.

you are you, with the ups and downs. And as mentioned earlier, someone fell inlove with that, and I belive it can happen again. Whether it will be someone new or someone else, only time can tell.

Sköt om dig och lycka till.

Onwards and Upwards!

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katysara


Moderator

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 3:12pm Post subject: Ohoj
Welcome Henrik,

Sorry I got in at the end of this conversation. You'll find us a friendly bunch.

KSx

I am an administrator on this site.

"Having a great intellect is no path to being happy."
~ Stephen Fry

See my website: www.katysaraculling.com

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Beyond


Member

Posted Mon Oct 8th, 2007 11:16pm Post subject: Ohoj
O hi Whattocallmyself? and Katysara

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