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robbie_333


Member

Posted Sat Jan 17th, 2009 3:05am Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality
wouldn't it be great if mr Fry navigated the very tricky subject of homosexuality. I don't believe mr Fry has ever really elabored the nature of homosexuality and his influence on gay people, through his art - the theatre, in life and across the world in general. He has investigated his depression, his choices and the world and yet Mr Fry has never really shown us his romantic life and his desires. As a straight acting gay man I believe it's time someone represented the true face of homosexuality and pulled the stereotype firmly out from under the guillotine. I for one am sick of television programs 'ready' to investigate this shady issue only to pull the cameras into the nightclubs to reveal hundreds of shirtless men strutting around to rihanna and licking at the camera shouting "ACCEPT US!". It isn't who we all are and I really wish someone in the spotlight would stand up and investigate the root cause of this provocative issue, for instance - where it comes from, the real issues gay people face, why there is a broad global issue that causes prejudices to manifest and gay people to hide. Gay people need an icon, and who better than Mr Fry? It's just a thought.

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The Oracle


Member

Posted Sat Jan 17th, 2009 4:51am Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality
Hello there robbie_333, now this is only my own personnel musings on this subject, but I think it is rather is and nice that he keeps his sexuality on the private side, yes we all know he is homosexual (I believe that is the case - not to get into any trouble here) but he obviously means to keep this matter away from the general public. He is a breed that would not want to be "Gaying it up" all over the place I think being a very private person this would be so.

I think so many things as you say are rather pushed in our face at times so it is freshing to know that someone is gay but is not wearing a placard. As for being a Gay icon no one could guess what Mr.Fry would think of that.

Before you come to any assumptions about me views on gay matters I will set it out. I am very straight, I adore men, I was a dancer many many years ago so you can see where this is going, sexual proclivity is rife, I'm not homophobic, I have many gay friends who I must say are the most dearest to me.

I hope that I haven't offended anyone because that was not my aim. I adore Mr.Fry (the person I perceive him to be, without knowing him on a personnal level. So really what I mean is this is his bag the BP maybe we have enough gay icons at the mo.

Take care.

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Nitro


Member

Posted Sat Jan 17th, 2009 5:55am Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality
Hmm..I'm not really sure I want to see Mr.Fry elaborating on his romantic life or desires. I mean...that's very personal stuff don't you think? I only wish that paralytic old creature who created Playboy would have a tenth of the class Mr.Fry appears to have X-D Instead we're bombarded by the old skeleton gnashing and grinning next to beautiful women who take his money. I can't imagine Mr.Fry behaving so, um...openly.

Straight, gay, or bi...I personally am not in the least bit interested in anyone parading about in their underwear, so to speak, to prove they have sex of some sort. X-D

What issues in homosexuality do you feel should be explored that haven't been already? I've seen some that are tastefully done and others that are embarassing beyond belief. But the point is, it *has* been done. Also, societies don't change at the drop of a hat. It takes time and by degrees. Too slowly, no doubt, for many but the Civil Rights movement took a long, long time before many of the goals were pragmatically implemented ( inter-racial public schools, for instance, only really got rolling in the 70's in many states here in America ). And even then it was tough for everyone involved.

Acceptance has come and continues to come but I do not think there will ever be a time, some Utopian world, where everyone simply accepts everyone for all reasons. For one, most of the 'big' religions still believe that homosexuality is an aberration of nature and patently against the will of God. Damnable on every level. In many texts in the Psychiatric field, homosexuality is defined as abnormal behavior. The point is, all the films and documentaries are great ( if done well ) but societies are complex and influenced by many things.

Stephen Fry is not as well known here as someone like Ellen DeGeneres is. She has been accepted by and large and some people who watch her show might have previously been repulsed by her 'lifestyle' ( how I loathe that word now! X-D ). But she's sort of 'broken through' some perceptions and bigotries, I think, because though she is openly gay she does not get on a soap box during her show nor get into details about her sex life.

Anyway, I don't mean to say your ideas are 'wrong' or anything like that. Only suggesting a few factors to consider and that, perhaps, being tasteful about a subject that is known to still bristle a great many people is more effective than elaborate detail.

Really? Wow.

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monochromeprincess


Member

Posted Sat Jan 17th, 2009 1:29pm Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality
Stephen Fry is not as well known here as someone like Ellen DeGeneres is. She has been accepted by and large and some people who watch her show might have previously been repulsed by her 'lifestyle' ( how I loathe that word now! X-D ). But she's sort of 'broken through' some perceptions and bigotries, I think, because though she is openly gay she does not get on a soap box during her show nor get into details about her sex life.

Gosh darnit you got there before me, I was just formulating a reply in my head and twas going to mention her :D.

I understand where you're coming from, robbie_333, and I can understand your desire for a gay role model. I completely get that. For me, I think almost the idea of not making it an issue is more inspiring - after all, as mentioned, we have come a long way in terms of rights and social attitudes - than making it a huge issue. If someone I admire can say, 'yeah I'm gay - what of it?' that means so much more, and I admire them so much more for it (strangely) than if they were constantly going on about acceptance, rights and all the rest of it. I love watching Ellen Degeneres and 'forgetting' she's gay, and just watching what she does, and seeing her as a person rather than 'a gay person' or a 'gay woman' because essentially that's what she is. She is a person, and she happens to be gay. Yes, when she talks to people about her sexuality and she does all the things that make gay people proud of what they are that's amazing (this, for example http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=A7addd1-SY8 is phenomenal. It makes my skin tingle), but the last taboo I think needs to be broken is to think of everyone as people regardless of what they are, more of who they are. The same that I've said about Ellen can be said about Mr Fry too, and I think gay people identify with him anyway as it is (you have found yourself here, have you not?) - and okay, it might not be the same with the bipolar issue, which after all is a massively different issue, but I think everyone's aware now about the existence of gay people and a lot about what it entails, places for support if necessary...whereas a lot of the bipolar thing was about awareness, getting new people diagnosed because it is a condition that needs to be treated. Gay people, thankfully, do not need to be treated X-D

So I hope you're not offended by that - one day we will be able to talk about it without fear of treading on each other's toes - but I want you to know I understand where you're coming from. I guess I don't feel quite as strongly as you because my sexuality isn't a really big thing to me because it is just another aspect of me. I don't want to walk around with a banner for other blue eyed people to be proud of the fact they have blue eyes, so I don't with this. Say I've got 'gay shame' or whatever; that's just how I feel, I think we should all think of each other as people before anything else.

mp xxxx

@dreamingshadow

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Firlefanz


Member

Posted Sat Jan 17th, 2009 7:59pm Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality
I know it doesn't exactly your description of a programme dealing with discrimination, but anyway, I wondered if you have seen John Barrowmans Making of Me, which deals with the question what actually makes some people gay and others not. You can easily find it on youtube.

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M.K.


Member

Posted Tue Jan 20th, 2009 9:46pm Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality
Once I was trying to talk about my bisexuality to an old friend of mine I haven’t seen for years. While I was managing to turn the conversation on that subject, she said something like: “I’ve got nothing against homosexuals, but I don’t like them much- I mean, they’re so …exhibitionists”. It hurt me, but it’s evidently true that stereotypes seem to be the first image which comes in mind to many people while mentioning homosexuality. Here, in Italy, those are often used by catholic-inspired parties “to denounce the promiscuity” of GLBT communities, which leads the public opinion not to give a due level of attention to those civil requests GLBT communities are asking for.

Anyway (it's a personal opinion of course) I don’t think there’s a better way to set against those stereotypes than not making public your private life that’s why I do admire Mr Fry very much for his sense of discretion. I think he actually may be considered as an icon, as a model without needing to do/say anything else than what he does/says. Artists and intellectuals as Colette or Gertrude Stein (not mentioning the peculiar case of Oscar Wilde) may be considered as icons as well. I mean, we are human beings after all, we chose to admire other human beings for being/doing what they are/do, if I made myself clear.

Love,
MK

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PamJH


Member

Posted Wed Jan 21st, 2009 12:02am Post subject: questions about the nature of sexuality


Anyway (it's a personal opinion of course) I don’t think there’s a better way to set against those stereotypes than not making public your private life that’s why I do admire Mr Fry very much for his sense of discretion. I think he actually may be considered as an icon, as a model without needing to do/say anything else than what he does/says. Artists and intellectuals as Colette or Gertrude Stein (not mentioning the peculiar case of Oscar Wilde) may be considered as icons as well. I mean, we are human beings after all, we chose to admire other human beings for being/doing what they are/do, if I made myself clear.

Love,
MK

I have to agree here. I think the world will be a better place when we all finally quit caring about everyone's sexual proclivities, religion or atheism, and all that kind of thing. I think we can do this best by concentrating on what's important, such as our families, friends and communities and work, and keeping our private lives private. I'm not sure I'd want to be an icon for anyone, even if I were famous. That's a lot of pressure.

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