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Nitro


Member

Posted Thu Dec 24th, 2009 12:10am Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Dear Prof,

Hmm..seems you have some 'splainin' to do to Evadne. There you go again unilaterally forgetting to tender information to your team mates. Why did you not mention your stint in the Asylum..um..I mean 'Anger Management'? Surely the poor man deserves some explanation. And compensation. I would suggest some socks. He might like those.

When you and Chip arrive in Tahiti, I've arranged for you to be met by this fellow:

http://www.1st-art-gallery.com/thumbnail/202181/1/.....841-48.jpg

He's slightly deaf so you may have to yell and wave your hands a lot. I will try to be available but the natives here so adore me that they literally are clinging to my back:

http://blahblahblah.beloblog.com/79710604PM006_A_BABY_MONKEY.JPG

I TOLD you I got a tan! However, this picture was taken before I went to see that doctor here you recommended a long time. Remember how irate I got, throwing stuff around the labratory? Yes, that was an embarassing incident on my part but I admit over the years I have reconsidered your advice. I'm currently having surgery to look more like this:

http://www.page2live.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/0.....34x300.jpg

What do you think? Oh it doesn't matter...in a day or two that is, essentially, what I will look like. Hopefully, it will discourage my simian co-harts from clinging so tirelessly to me.

No problem on the passport. But I am wondering what happeed to the last ten I acquired for you. I also speculate you probably remember very little of the circumstances of their loss.

Well, time for a swim outside my new digs..

http://casa.colorado.edu/~dduncan/Tahiti_water.jpg

Enjoy your trip and don't let the guy at the bridge bother you if he makes a smart remark about your sandwhich board. He's prone to such social neglect.

Yours in continued holidaze,
Triple T

Really? Wow.

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Maxx England


Member

Posted Tue Jan 5th, 2010 9:05pm Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Evadne reporting for the last time. I have sent all the Butte-Plugges back, had the devil's own job getting the last few out. This lack of commitment by those who paint themselves as leaders and then abdicate responsibility is intolerable.

I shall rededicate myself to the old family business, which as you well know, is the manufacture and export to the American South of self igniting incendiary religious symbols. I am now also thinking of turning my attention to the Arab world, and producing an inflammable Star Of David, to accompany the self combusting American flag in a DIY Xenophobia kit.

Yours, with regret, your late servant,

Major Evadne Gooseposture.

The only way is forward. Now where's the bar?

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Nitro


Member

Posted Wed Jan 6th, 2010 11:46pm Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Dear Major Dude,

As you know it was the Professor who started this project. And then she sucked us both in, as usual, with promises of riches, power, sex without repurcussions, nice cars, and good food. The question is, why do we both keep falling for it?

My answer is that I am a monkey and will tend to fall for just about anything. Plus, there is my love for the Professors endless promises which you must admit border on the poetic.

The most recent word is that the Professor is once again using 'sickness' as an excuse to abandon her assumed responsibilities. It's told to me, by my spy-vine, that this 'sickness' is really a code word for: "Laying about drunk with several good looking lads under my arms and feeding me grapes."

I don't begrudge the Prof for this hobby one bit. Everyone needs a little fun after all.

She may be, emphasis on 'may', headed towards my current location which is Tahiti. Once here, we will probably drink a lot and talk about our next big plans. We may buy an island. One never knows once we're together just what might happen.

You sound a little tense though. So, maybe you should consider joining us and we can iron out all our angries over colorful drinks and generally self-indulgent behaviors. You can tell all your freinds your on a secret mission and let them continue to think you are uptight and psychotic. Maintaining a facade is necessary in some situations, as you know. But once here, hey, put on a grass skirt and relax a little!

Emerald waters and majestic sunsets await me now, not to mention a few police officers who, like yourself, seem slightly uptight. I'm sure they'll be fine once I lead them down into my hidden labratory. Wish me luck

TTT

Really? Wow.

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Nitro


Member

Posted Thu Jan 7th, 2010 7:17pm Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Dear Major and Tito,

Noticed this and thought I'd send you both a case in honor of our former partnership:

http://www.ilovechickenpoop.com/images/medium/CP_tube_perspective_07.jpg

Don't use it all at once!

TT "smooth lips" T

Really? Wow.

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tito


Member *

Posted Sat Jan 9th, 2010 11:43am Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

I'll have you know that this is how I spent last week!

http://www.winecentury.com/blog/wp-content/myimage.....acchus.jpg

Cuddles, Professor Universe xx


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tito


Member *

Posted Sat Jan 9th, 2010 11:46am Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Drattit, stupiding wrong picture, damn.................

Ahem.

Someone just hijacked my profile posted a picture saying it was me and my frolics last week. THIS was me last week, working away for the cause!

http://cache4.asset-cache.net/xc/HL2880-001.jpg?v=.....22FB410D56

This is not a vacuum cleaner but a prototype laser missile.

Kisses, Professor Universe


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tito


Member *

Posted Sat Jan 9th, 2010 8:19pm Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

P.S. http://www.page2live.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/0.....34x300.jpg

This looks remarkably like the guy who climbed in through my bedroom window the other night with a rose between his teeth!

Then he noticed I looked like a housewife and left me a bag of dirty laundry.


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Nitro


Member

Posted Wed Jan 13th, 2010 3:46am Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Dear Prof,

Hmm...so that might be why no one could figure out where you'd gone. You were cavorting..I mean, doing that sexy mans dirty laundry...yeahhhh...OK, you might be able to sell that to Evadne, but not me. I know you too well and have seen you in action you seductress you. All those broken hearted youths left in your wake and you claiming all the while you were just 'doing their laundry'. I see now that's just a code you use to obscure your predilections and amusements. And that's OK. You can only be you and you are OK and it's all OK. OK?

Anyway, that fellow you met by the bridge to help you and Chip escape to Tahiti said he did see you and give you the information. He then told me he's not responsible for anything after that, threw some swear words at me, and then I had the living cack beat out of him by your former brother-in-law; Tony 'Bust Knees' Marone. Tony's a good fellow and he asked me to send you his regards.

Now that I'm tan and looking less simian, I am feeling a bit better about myself. The old confidence returning. However, I still have little motivation to do more than float around on a raft like a bloated whale. But that doctor you referred me to was fantastic. Here's how I look now:

http://drx.typepad.com/psychotherapyblog/images/2007/08/15/cary_grant_2.jpg

It's really beautiful here. And so am I.

Look forward to seeing you and Chip soon. That is, if you haven't tossed his empty shell to the side already you Vamp!

--The Tan, Beautiful Tourist aka TTBT..or just BT if it's more convenient

Really? Wow.

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tito


Member *

Posted Wed Jan 13th, 2010 5:40pm Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Dear BT,

You look absolutley bloody stunning. It's all over with me and Chip.

He made me a necklace out of his old toenail clippings.

I was expecting something like this!

http://pinkninja.net/wish/barbie_rainbow.png

I am a woman of taste after all.

I am in counselling at the minute to help me get over the end of this current relationship.

Whatshisname was the love of my life!

Cuddles, professor Universe xx


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Nitro


Member

Posted Fri Jan 15th, 2010 5:39pm Post subject: Temporary posting place for secret plans to take over the world

Dear Prof,

Thanks for your wise compliments. They are dead on, I must admit. The downside is I'm developing a bit of an obsession about myself, to the point it's offending some of my staff. Oh well.

Poor Chip. I'm sort of glad I didn't actually *recommend* him and hope you don't hold your infatuation with the man against me. I know your sense of humour, so before you think it my answer is,"No, I don't want the necklace."

I'm sure your next big love affair you will obtain a man capable of affording that Barbie necklace.

As for your friend, I feel I must remind you and caution you about your last 'counselor'. I hope this one is a woman because, well, need I say more?

I'll be leaving Tahiti in a few days. They are in a mirror shortage right now and currently blaming me. Which, to be honest, isn't far from the truth. I might need to see that counselor of yours myself soon.

For now, it's back to gazing at myself.

Ta ta,
BT

Really? Wow.

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