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Posted Wed Dec 14th, 2011 7:27am Post subject: Terminal Technology

This will mean nothing to no one, and I fully support and understand that, but my laptop is terminal.

Maybe I should rephrase that...

My laptop is dieing a slow death and some of it's my fault.

This one's a Toshiba and I have to bow to them for making such a physically durable little machine. I am very, very hard on machines because, well, they're machines and I want to be able to drop a thing and bump a thing and you get the point, without it crying or making me feel guilty. I also don't want it to scratch too easily and I want it to be stable from the inside out. That's too much to ask of living things, but not plastic and metal ( sorry if I'm upsetting those sensitive to machines in an emotional way ).

This fine creation has endured much and still kept working, but Toshiba can't steal the Timex copy.

On one occasion I squeezed the LCD screen just a bit TOO hard when my foot became entangled in the power cord on my way to get myself a drink. I stayed balanced but the pull was causing the laptop to slide towards the edge of the table, so I made one of those desperate grabs at it. The pressure was too much and the little crystals broke underneath my thumb. Over the days, they 'bled out' and a black kind of rust, ( like blood mwah hahhahaha ), spread across and down the screen. I lost quite a bit of desktop with that and spent many months just resizing the windows enough away that I could still see stuff. My desktop I just accessed via the start panel. Clumsy me...

Then one fateful tired night I fell asleep with a cigarette in my mouth and woke to find it glued to the space bar, the 'N', and the 'H' keys. The plastic melted, of course, and left a snakey brown scar on their surfaces.

Between the keyboard and my screen you may be able to imagine what it looks like after many previous normal abuses of just wearing letters off from normal typing, bumping, and spills.

Speaking of spills...the most recent one may be the straw that has broken the little machines back. It wasn't a horribly big spill, and I managed it alright, but it has had a corrosive effect by degrees on key depression. In other words, it's at the point I'm, for certain words and expressions, having to finger pound the keys too frequently. Not to mention some other more subtle degradations of GUI use that I probably won't be able to frustrate myself with for much longer.

I dread the backup chores and the transfer chores that threaten me with more tedious technonecessities to face, but can't help but remain impressed with the years of service this nice little laptop has allowed me to enjoy. And I hope one day to find a laptop specifically designed for users who would like to be able to purposefully drop-kick their machines across a floor for no other particular reason than that they can. In the interim, if they can take some drooling, burning, snoring, scratching, squeezing and bumping, I'll be a happy camper.

Thank you Toshiba for having ever considered your clumsier customers and thank you my faithful laptop for enduring my company for so long.

( But boy will I be happy as a pig in shit to be rid of Vista!! )

Really? Wow.

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