Listening to you doing interviews, watching your documentaries, reading your books... Everytime I take part of some of your work I just feel so human. And suddenly nothing matters anymore. Why do I spend hours in front of the mirror, doing nothing but critisize myself? Why do I put on a mask in front of strangers? Why do I care about other people's opinions when it's so obvious that it doesn't matter, it shouldn't matter.
I'm on a mission to change myself, and I'm currently in the middle of this transformation. It is a bit scary, but the progress I've made so far gives me nothing but pleasure and harmony in life. I try to embrace people, show them my love, feel for them, and devote myself to making this place more human. I try to treat every new person I meet as my best friend. I try, I fail, but I keep trying and I do make progress. Because you know what? I can't live with my old self, my old self-loathing self, my old people-hating self. Ever since I officially got cured of my social phobia I've been trying to do my best to become someone I'd love to meet myself. Someone to look up to, someone that loves, someone that always provides support. Someone like you. You are my hero. My role-model, and I just feel I have to thank you for everything you've helped me through, through the medium of your work. Words can't describe how greatful I am.
This world is cold, but it's also so very warm. It's both at the same time. Although I suffer from depression from time to time, I try to remind myself of that, and it keeps me going.
Thank you Stephen, for being a pillar in my life. Someday I wish to speak to you in person, thank you, but if that time never comes, I still wanted you to know how much your work has mattered to me.
With love, Em