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Britannicus


Member

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 1:15am Post subject: Trust? HA!
Remind me to never confide in anyone ever again. I revealed to a friend a bit of what has been bothering me these past few months. I told her only enough to get her to back off. Next thing I know, she's gone and told other people, and not only that, she fabricated details to fill in the holes of the story. Now I have individuals that are angry at me for something that never occurred, that they never had any part in.

I don't know whether to be overwhelmingly angry or sad. Or both.

"Your room...it's CLEAN!!!"
"I prayed to God...and...it happened...but...where's my million dollars and horse!? Damn it!"

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Fryphile


Member *

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 1:35am Post subject: Trust? HA!
Snitches get stitches. What a pathetic, empty person.

Not you, but the person you confided in.

I think of myself as someone who is filled with love, whose only purpose in life was to achieve love. - Stephen Fry

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Piera


Member

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 3:31am Post subject: Trust? HA!
I've realized in life that I could never truly confide in a person. Friend or family, they usually never understand where I'm coming from, and will just as usually bring the topic up again at when it's something that shouldn't be brought up so casually.

My best friend is an empty notebook and blue felt-tip pen. So long as I keep it hidden away, it won't betray my trust.

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Panja


Member

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 4:07am Post subject: Trust? HA!
I know what that's like, I find it hard to confide in people anymore because I'm afraid they'll tell other people or bring it up in conversation at the worst possible time. My best friend in elementary school did that to me and I think it's probably what has fueled some of my anti-social behaviour that I still struggle with now.

My best friend is an empty notebook and blue felt-tip pen. So long as I keep it hidden away, it won't betray my trust.
Make sure it's hidden really really well! One of my best friends found (and read!!) mine, and I really wish he at least hadn't told me about it. Would have been better if he hadn't read it at all, but now I just wish I didn't know that he has read all my secrets. Thank banana he didn't find the more recent one...

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 4:13am Post subject: Trust? HA!
Hey Brit, I'm really sorry this happened! I would suggest you clear things up with the people who are angry with you (it's enough to say they were misinformed, they don't need to know the whole story) and, if you're up to it, find out from your friend why she made up these extra details. Did she just imagine them up on her own/ Did she (incorrectly) extrapolate them from what you DID say?

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Britannicus


Member

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 4:56am Post subject: Trust? HA!
I provided a very vague version of the what, she added in the who and those people in turn revised exactly what the "what" was into something that doesn't even resemble the reality.

The story they've come up with is bizarre and laughable. They've turned my recent nightmare into some ludicrous junior high drama. If it weren't for the fact that it touches a painful moment in my life...ha. However, if they want to believe that that would make me seclude myself to my room for six weeks, then fine. Good riddance.

Although I will tell them that they are misinformed if it does happen to come up again. I won't force the issue.

"Your room...it's CLEAN!!!"
"I prayed to God...and...it happened...but...where's my million dollars and horse!? Damn it!"

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amyl_nitrate


Member

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 11:56am Post subject: Trust? HA!
That's all you can do. Make it clear they were misinformed and the facts weren't straight and if they still get mad at you just laugh it off and walk away. Friends will be understanding, arses won't care about you or the facts and will just latch onto any excuse to make a drama scene. It's moments like these that make you realise who are your friends and who aren't very good friends at all.

Assuming direct control...

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Anonymous


Unregistered

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 3:06pm Post subject: Trust? HA!
The unfortunate reality is that the traumas of our lives only seem like DRAMAS to others. I hope your friends realize that you need their empathy (not their sympathy) and provide it forthwith or, failing that, they give you the space you need to deal.

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Red Raven


Member

Posted Thu Apr 3rd, 2008 3:29pm Post subject: Trust? HA!
I think everyone has experience this at some point or other. with me it was my mom. she doesn't know the meaning of secret. good rule of thumb I've learned is to not tell anyone something that you don't want the world to know. Once to tell someone a secret, you have basically given it to them and it's theirs to do with what they will. Sometimes the person is good for their word and will keep it for themselves but you never know until you put that trust in them. It's a leap of faith. Sometimes the landing hurts.

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diane tigue


Member

Posted Fri Apr 4th, 2008 9:23pm Post subject: Trust? HA!
you know sometimes we agonize over things like this and it turns out the other person wasn't hurt or offended as much as we feared. People gossip - it is human nature and the sure way to have an uncomfortable conversation be heard by the world is to say to the person you are talking to - "now this is strictly between you and me".

I'd rather be the hurtee than the hurter.

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karen m


Member

Posted Sun Apr 6th, 2008 7:52pm Post subject: Trust? HA!
the way i see things is that you're damned if you do damned if you don't, if you confide in people you get it off your chest but run the risk of it being spread like wildfire. If you keep everything in then you run the risk of going crazy or unable to deal with all the stuff until it comes to a head and you just lose it big time, this has happened to me more than once and i'm only just finding ways to deal with al the stuff that needs to be let out, i also wrote/write things down but after my family found some of it and gained some knowedge that they really should have remained ignorant about i burnt the rest of it which actually made me feel even better

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Help


Member

Posted Thu Apr 10th, 2008 10:25am Post subject: Trust? HA!
Remind me to never confide in anyone ever again. I revealed to a friend a bit of what has been bothering me these past few months. I told her only enough to get her to back off. Next thing I know, she's gone and told other people, and not only that, she fabricated details to fill in the holes of the story. Now I have individuals that are angry at me for something that never occurred, that they never had any part in.

I don't know whether to be overwhelmingly angry or sad. Or both.

From my own experience I know I was both angry and sad.
WHy do people do things like that?
It just makes you have zero trust in the entire planet, and you know not everyone is like that..but well trying to convince me of that is another thing entirely.
I do hope you're feeling a bit better.

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Britannicus


Member

Posted Fri Apr 11th, 2008 11:07pm Post subject: Trust? HA!
I'm doing better. Thanks. What can be cleared up has been and what can't be...well, I've learned to live with it. Thanks for all your comments and help, everyone. ^_^

"Your room...it's CLEAN!!!"
"I prayed to God...and...it happened...but...where's my million dollars and horse!? Damn it!"

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