STEPHEN FRY

Here's the planana, bananas:

We're going to perform Stephen's How to be Lovely sketch in our own unique and sparkling ways. This idea is modeled after the ambitious goal of re-creating "Star Wars" in 15 second increments, as seen HERE. Feel free to use the "Star Wars" examples to inspire you with your own part of the sketch.

Which brings us to the Fluffetted version of the sketch:

I think it was The Fluffettes who pointed out how lovely Stephen Fry was. Until that time, I think it was safe to say that Stephen had never really been aware of his own timeless brand of loveliness. But our words smote him because, of course, you see, Stephen is lovely in a fluffy, moist kind of a way. Who would have it otherwise? He walks, let's be splendid about this, in a lightly-scented cloud of gorgeousness that isn't a far short from being quite simply terrific. The secret to smooth, almost shiny loveliness, of the order which we are discussing in this simple, frank, creamy-soft way doesn't reside in oils, unguents, balms, ointments, creams, astringents, milks, moisturizers, liniments, lubricants, embrocations, or balsams, to be rather divine for just one noble moment; it resides, and we mean this in a pink, slightly special way, in one's attitude of mind. To be gorgeous and high and true and fine and fluffy and moist and sticky and lovely, all Stephen has to do is to believe that he is gorgeous and high and true and fine and fluffy and moist and sticky and lovely. And we believe it, tremulously at first and then with mounting heat and passion because, stopping off for a second to be super again, he's so often told it. That's the secret really.

On January 1, 2010, I will assign sections of the sketch to those who wish to participate. You will have one month to perform your section however you choose. February 1, 2010, is the deadline to email your completed section to gjhsu and monochromeprincess. You may PM them here to ask for their addresses or DM them on Twitter. monochromeprincess is @dreamingshadow on Twitter and gjhsu is bizarrely @gjhsu. With their combined editing talents, they will weave our sections together into an electric tapestry of awesome. At the end of the sketch, there will be a message that says, "Happy Valentine's Day, Stephen! From the #fluffettes." Then an end credit of all our Twitter names will scroll. Then blackout. Then thunderous applause. Then Oscars and eight-figure deals at Paramount. IT WILL HAPPEN.

We will use the rest of the year getting a finalized list of those who wish to participate. With the holiday season, some people might be traveling and not be on the internet as much, so I want to give everyone ample time to volunteer. Here is a list of everyone who wanted to do something for Stephen when ginj posted the initial Valentine's Day think tank thread:

1. ginj
2. nemelle
3. Fryphile
4. nongenderous
5. loris_sl
6. Soph
7. nrepka
8. andrealein
9. zomgmouse
10. Hope
11. tui
12. monochromeprincess
13. tsirafauna
14. Laur1991
15. striped_mouse
16. Mandibles
17. gjhsu
18. inckognito
19. Love_Kingdom
20. Rain Dog
21. ladyfromhamburg
22. GirlGatsby
23. fryfan20
24. NickTheName
25. Help
26. hughsbeautiful
27. glueyourfingers
28. lonesome_aesthetic
29. IdeaCollector
30. TinaL

Pretty much if you responded in any way to that thread, your name is listed. If you DO NOT WISH to participate in this particular project, please respond to this thread saying so and I'll take your name off the list. Otherwise, I'll assume you're participating. I'll probably PM y'all, too, just to make supersure.

As for you sections themselves: They may be performed any way you feel comfortable with. If you don't wish to be seen on camera, you do not have to record yourself on camera. We will need your voice, though, either in English or your native tongue. Whatever makes you comfortable. Subtitles can be used if need be. If you don't wish to appear on camera, we can have a particular picture of Stephen appear while you read your section. We are limited only by our imagination. There's no real time limit on anyone's section, but we can probably do without 15 minute Shatner-esque pauses. Stephen did the sketch in 1 minute, 7 seconds. It doesn't matter if ours is a bit longer. I'm not too concerned about maintaining Stephen's speaking pattern because he has an awful pretty and nimble mouth.

Bullet points:

-Let me know if you DO NOT WISH to participate in this particular project and I'll take your name off the aforementioned list.

-January 1, 2010, sections will be assigned.

-February 1, 2010 is deadline to email completed section to gjhsu and monochromeprincess/@dreamingshadow

-February 14, 2010, gjhsu will post it to Youtube.

-A bit later, Stephen will die of squee.

-Do whatever you wish with your section. The more diversely creative, the better.

Good Luck. And May the Fluffettes be with you.